Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
