I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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