You're completely useless in the revolution.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
he quoted the bible to break up with me
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Randomize
