dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
19 People Confess The Craziest Sex Act They’ve Ever Participated In
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.