What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
