some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Randomize