What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Randomize
