last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
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