I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
