dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
