I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
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