your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
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