I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
