bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son