just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
