yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
