For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
