she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
