dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
