Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.