i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
