but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
