they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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