I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
