I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Randomize
