he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
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