why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize