I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
