if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
