One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize