Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize