please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
