Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Randomize
