Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
