just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
honey bunches of taint.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Randomize
