is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
