I'd wear matching sweaters with you
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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