if you like me you must not know who I am
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize