Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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