Yo dont text me then not text me
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
