i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
