Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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