finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize