Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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