i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
