Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
