did you get engaged???
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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