She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
