i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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