i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize