Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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